HOPE

I drove 320 miles with a dear friend, and we talked and laughed the whole time.  Our destination was to a HOPE retreat for breast cancer survivors in Springfield, MO.

Having been to Springfield many times, imagine my surprise when we arrived at Elfindale Mansion, a place I did not know existed, and yet is was only several blocks from Bass Pro Shop – a place I have been many times. 

The Mansion has an interesting history.  You can read about it here.  It has traded hands from a private residence, to a Catholic order of nuns, to a Catholic Academy for girls, to a safe house for the Shah of Iran, to a Christian Church property and bed and breakfast. 

Gathered together were six breast cancer survivors and four facilitators.  We quickly adopted the credo, “what happens at the Mansion, stays at the Mansion”. 

Private rooms and baths for all in very large suites. 

My friend, Dorothy, is sassy and sweet.  I want to be like HER when I’m 80!

The lookout tower was the perfect place to go for writing and reflecting.  The windows looked down on the lake below.

   Our early morning strolls took us by this cottage that I would give my eye teeth to get my hands on.  Breathing new life into it would be such a joy.  Does Hansel and Gretel come to mind to you too?

 

We also strolled by this peaceful creek, as we talked and shared.

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The retreat originated as a dream of a breast cancer survivor from Colorado.  She passed away shortly after hosting the first retreat in 2004.  Her family are continuing her legacy through Sisters HOPE.  It is a nonprofit organization that, after this wonderful experience, I intend to get involved with.  To read more about Sisters HOPE, click here.

 

This was the first time that I had shared my cancer story with other survivors.  It was amazing how much the same and yet how different our stories are.  We talked, laughed, and cried together.  We looked at where we were and where we are today – and how the experience of cancer has changed each and every one of us.  We mourned the losses and celebrated our successes.  We came together as strangers and left 3 1/2 days later as sisters.  Sisters with a plan for the future.

Will I Ever Learn Wednesday 6-23-10

From the fish stories I was told, hubby and his buddy caught many fish.  Hubby sent them home with buddy (or so he says).  That’s ok by me.  I'm just glad they had a good time.  It is so hot here that neither cooking or eating is very appealing, unless maybe it is ice cream.   I fixed loaded baked potatoes for supper.  Loaded with bacon, broccoli, butter, sour cream, cheese.  They definitely hit the spot.

Tomorrow I am leaving for Springfield, MO with a friend.  We are attending a retreat at The Mansion At Elfindale.  It is a three day retreat for cancer survivors.  I’ll have to admit that never in a million years would I have thought to sign up for this, but Dorothy wanted to go.  Dorothy is an older lady who I admire very much.  I trust we will have a wonderful time and return home renewed and refreshed.  More on that next week.

And here we go with a short Wednesday moment…

WILL I EVER LEARN…

Several weeks ago I spent some time with my brother at his apartment on the East End of Jefferson City, helping him with his computer.  Having grown up in that area, I know my way around very well.  However, they have recently done a lot of road work, improving the highways, putting in an over pass, re-routing roads.  All of this because Wal Mart came to that end of the city.  Are you surprised that Wal Mart can cause such change in an otherwise quiet area?  Me neither. 

Anyway, with all of the changes, they put in a number of round-abouts.  I’m happy to report that round-abouts no longer make me shake and sweat profusely when I come to one.  I have them figured out and breeze right through them. 

Leaving brother’s apartment, I was distracted and thinking about everything else left to do in the already disappearing day.  I breezed through the first round-about that leads almost immediately into another.  I breezed right through that one too and headed down the highway.

About 15 miles later I noticed a sign pointing to a little town.  The sign said Westphalia.  I shook my head and blinked a couple of times.  Westphalia? 

I was heading the wrong direction!  Why didn’t I notice the sign to Taos?  That would have given me my first clue.  But Westphalia?  15 or more miles the wrong way on a stretch of highway that I know like the fingers I’m typing with. 

Yes, my friends, I was that distracted and befuddled.  I forgot to mention that I have no sense of direction.  But Westphalia?

I wonder if Dorothy knows what she’s getting into letting me navigate to Springfield….  At least Buggy is tripping along in good shape now.  I think I’ll let Emmy Lou (my GPS) lead the way.

Have a wonderful rest of the week everyone!

 

Tuesday it is

How is it that it is Tuesday already?  Where did Monday go?

Summer is here in full force.  The humidity isn't the "slap you in the face" kind today yet, but it has the potential to get there.  Jim and a buddy just headed out for a fishing hole.  He likes to go to a little town not toO faR from here, Frankenstein.  No, I've never seen any monsters there.  But they do have a fishing spot that is wonderful.  It is known by the locals as Stieferman's Bluff.  The scenery is beautiful.  The water is clear and shallow in some places - making it a great place to take young kids.  Then as you meander down the stream, there are some awesome fishing holes.  I'm hoping for some more tasty fish tonight.

My bathroom project is at a standstill once again.  My frustration level is over the top.  I don't get frazzled easily, but this project has tried my patience beyond grinning and bearing it.  Everything has taken so much longer than I ever thought possible.  My house has been torn up with everything out of place for such a long time that it seems normal.  We finally got the ceiling in, all of the painting, trim boards, etc. done, the tub in place and have been waiting for the plumber to come back out to finish the plumbing.  Now, this is the guy who has already been here.  He knows the scope of the project.  Has done the initial plumbing, and just needed to hook everything up:  tub, stool, sink.  Easy peasy.  Right?  Wrong.

The tub, being the kind of tub it is, takes a special fitting.  Ok.  They knew the type of tub it is.  That is why we hired professionals in the first place.  That is why we already had them out here.  He also didn't have a fitting for the sink.  What?  What is the world did he think he was coming to my house for?  A tea party?

Ok.  I just had to get that off my chest.  Whew.

I'm heading into town to pick up some things I need, go to the bank, go to work, go to the grocery store and then home.  I hope inspiration knocks me in the head with an idea for a tasty supper between now and the grocery store - just in case they bring home fish stories rather than fish.

Hope everyone has a wonderful day!

Dads

This morning at church Fr. Greg asked that all Fathers and Grandfathers stand and be recognized in prayer. As the musicians at Mass today, we had a birds eye view of the congregation. There sure are a lot of dads!

Since our parish has grown in leaps and bounds over the past five years, I no longer know all of the families - and dads. Yet, I do. They tell a story by their looks and actions.

I saw a young father affectionately ruffle his toddler's hair, while holding in his arms a baby.
I saw another dad look sternly at his little girl as she prepared to trot across the church bench in search of the unknown.
I saw a grandpa holding the hands of the two grandchildren he and his wife are raising.
I saw a dad standing all alone, his wife already in heaven, and children long gone to other pastures.
I saw a father glance proudly sideways at his teen towering over him.
I saw one dad kiss his baby's cheek as he handed the child to his own dad for safekeeping.
I saw our spiritual dad stand at the altar, leading us in prayer, and then encouraging everyone, especially the dads, to stick around after Mass for yummy donuts iced with chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry.
And in all of these dads I saw the hand of our ultimate dad, God - guiding them, encouraging them, helping them along the way.

My own dad is no longer with me. Jim's dad died many years ago. I miss them both. But as I looked around me today, I felt encouraged that there are many wonderful dads in this world. I want to thank each and every one of them for their roles in the lives of our future.

My daughter, Julie, blogged a tribute to her daddy the other day. Not because it was Father's Day, but just because she felt like it. Her timing was perfect though. You can read about what a wonderful daddy she has here

How is it possible?

 

We got married on June 17, 1972 – Jim and Deanna

We’ve always been called Jim and Deanna – never Deanna and Jim.  Strange how that works.  If I say something about friends, it is always Rita and Leon, or Patti and Gerard.  Anyway, we are known as Jim and Deanna.

38 years, 3 kids, and 10 grandkids later, we are still going strong.

Oh, I’m not going to pretend we didn’t have our ups and downs.  Little things, like him giving me a broom for one of our anniversaries, tend to cause a ruckus.  In his defense, I did mention the day before that I needed a new broom.

I think I tested the “for worse” part of our vows when I dumped a glass of wine over his head.  For the life of me I can no longer remember the words that caused such anger.  But I do remember he calmly got up and cleaned himself up and then cleaned the mess up too.  Fortunately, we laugh about it today.

The fact that he is sensitive helps a lot.  He makes me cry almost every Christmas.   It’s always a good cry.  Like the time I had lost the diamond in my wedding ring.  Rather than replace it, I was wearing a gold band.  He made me cry when he replaced the diamond as my Christmas present.  That is just one of many good cries.

 

He sorely tested my patience when I asked him to go on a business trip to San Jose with me.  He whined and worried like an old mother hen.  Finally, on our way to the KC airport,  I threatened to leave him on the side of the road.  That finally hushed him up.  And now… we both adore traveling.

He likes to shop as much as I hate it.  If I really need an outfit for something, I take him with me – otherwise, I am likely to come home empty handed.

And building this house.  Oh my gosh!  We moved into the basement before the upstairs was even properly closed in.  The second morning after we moved in, I discovered Julie, barely one at the time, on the “storage side” of the basement, ready to pick up a little green garter snake. 

Then there was this little gotcha called breast cancer.  He was by my side every step of the way.  He held my head when I was puking.  He sat in the waiting room, during my many operations, waiting to hear that I was once again going to be ok.  He made me laugh when I wanted to cry.  And he never once expressed doubt that God was walking along with us on this crazy journey we were on. 

We are stronger because of everything we’ve been through together.

Hey Jim, when you read this, just know that I love you very much!  Happy Anniversary.

Will I Ever Learn Wednesday Pre-empted by an important message

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GREG AND BILL!

On June 16, 34 years ago, we welcomed our son, Greg, into the world. Happy Birthday Gregory!

Hubby had promised me that we would celebrate our anniversary on the 17th with a dinner out. We had my mom and dad lined up to watch our two year old daughter, Tessa.

We didn’t count on the fact that our dinner out would be in the hospital. But we sure didn’t mind.

Greg. There is not a sweeter, more generous, caring, son on earth. It is not possible.

I will do a “Will I Ever Learn” on Jim, though. You see, he tried to make up for the fact that I was in the hospital, eating hospital food, on our anniversary. Now, keep in mind I just had a child. Women who have just given birth are just like all other animal – our boobs fill with milk and relief from the fullness and pain is difficult, even when nursing, which I was.

Any guesses on what Jim brought me for an anniversary treat?

Did anybody guess a milk shake? A CHOCOLATE milk shake! Babies cannot have chocolate – even after processed through mom’s system. And the last thing a new mother needs to drink is a milk shake! The pain of those swollen breasts is still vivid in my mind.

Our son-in-law, Bill, was also born on this date - I believe 37 years ago (please let me be right…) I really need to do a Bill post one of these days. Bill is a wonderful son-in-law and I cannot think of anyone better suited for oldest daughter, Tessa. Happy Birthday Bill!!!

He ate the evidence…

 

… and it was sooooo goood!!!!!!