Will I ever learn Wednesday

It’s that time of week again where I get to tell the world just how ditzy I can be.

WILL I EVER LEARN…

How is it that when one room is being messed with, the whole house gets trashed?

About a year ago I got the hair brained idea that our 29+ year old out dated bathroom needed a facelift. The “facelift”, which began in earnest 2 or so weeks ago, included gutting the bathroom and fixing a sagging span of wall where a stained glass window goes. I’ll do a proper post on that when the job is done, but right now…

Everything has been removed from the walls surrounding the bathroom and the fireplace mantle so that the hammering doesn’t jar something loose.

Dry wall dust is everywhere…

There are tools in the hallway…

There is a hole in the wall where my beautiful stained glass window used to be… (and yes, it will be put back in there)

And, of course, my bathroom is a mess!

We tend to remodel a lot. So I know what it entails. Yet I keep thinking of things to change. Will I ever learn!

--------------------------------------------------

I was helping hubby put in a heavy beam across the span where you saw the hole in the previous picture. Now that experience is a post in itself. Oh my goodness! At one point during the whole ordeal the hot flashes flared. The kind of hot flash where my face was redder than a vine ripened tomato. So I scurried down the ladder and turned the thermostat down to 50 – even though the furnace wasn’t even on at the time. I don’t know why… but just doing that made me feel better.

Last night as I was curled up in my favorite recliner, remote in hand, watching television, waiting for hubby to get home... and I was freezing. So I curled up into a tighter ball than I already was and covered myself with the heaviest blanket I own (thank you Julie and Doug for the Christmas present). When hubby got home, I told him the temperature must really have dropped again because it sure was cold in our house. He calmly walked over to the thermostat, turned it back on, and just shook his head at me…

-------------------------------------------------------------

And here is one from my not too distant past. It comes straight from a Chevy Chase movie, or Three Stooges… and I fell for it.

I was drinking a cup of coffee while visiting with some co-workers. Three of us. Me and two guys. Guy one says, “What time is it?” The other guy grins and says, “I don’t know”. Deanna (me), always obliging, promptly twisted my wrist to look at my watch and poured my coffee out onto the floor. Yes it was planned by guy one and guy two and yes they howled with laughter! I’ll have to admit, I laughed pretty hard too.

It is still a blustery cold day today, but the sun is smiling down on me. So, I’m going to bundle myself up and head out to see what kind of mischief I can get into.

Stay safe out there!

Happiness is the simple things

It is raining today – the kind of rain that will probably turn into ice or snow by tonight or tomorrow. But, as I was baking a cake to take to my son’s house this afternoon, my thoughts turned to happiness. By general nature, I am a happy person. But, it is the simple things that bring me the most happiness. Things like:

• baking a cake, knowing others will enjoy it
• encouraging my grandchildren as they succeed, and loving them and encouraging them even more when they struggle
• watching from a distance with pride as my own children make their way in this world
• stolen moments alone in prayer with God
• a day with my children and their families
• a full nights sleep without being rudely awakenwith hot flashes – repeatedly… (a night sweat free night doesn’t happen often and I really do treasure it when it does)
• daily calls from my kids, or even an unexpected call from them, just asking how we are doing
• the first snow fall of the season.... and the last snow fall of the season!
• a simple, warm hug and kiss from hubby as heads out the door
• memories from my past
• sunshine on my face
• the colors of fall
• a day of hard physical work, followed by a day of mind bending mental work that leaves me just as exhausted
• sitting around a camp fire
• getting together with friends
• old photos
• new photos
• front porch sitting with hubby and a glass (or two or three) of wine
• family treasures
• a good glass of bourbon or rum and coke
• a walk in the woods
• riding my 4-wheeler
• exploding colors of spring flowers
• the beautiful blossoms of our cherry trees and the tart cherry pies we have because of them
• a call from a friend – just to chat or vent or well, just because…
• exercising, knowing I am doing the best I can
• making someone smile, just by giving them one of my own goofy grins
• playing my mandolin, or as our pastor calls it, my plunker

The list is endless! What simple pleasure makes you happy?

Will I ever learn Wednesday…

It is that time of week again where I get to tell the world just how ditzy I can be.

WILL I EVER LEARN…

Hubby and I had the following conversation last night:

(This one is actually on hubby, but he knows all is fair in blogville)

Me: Tomorrow is Ash Wednesday. Do you want to go to Church at the Nursing Home with your mom.

Hubby: Let’s see what day is tomorrow…. Wednesday, right?

Me: Errrr that’s why it’s called Ash Wednesday….

----------------------------------------

I’m a Mafia Wars nut on Facebook. I know… it is such a waste of time! I will be the first to admit that I’m not real good at these games, but I get hooked on them anyway. In my defense, I have forsaken every farm known to the internet, and Yoville, in favor of Mafia Wars and Blackjack (gulp, yes I love to gamble… but not with real money).

So anyway. My Mafia Wars hard earned money kept getting stolen! Well, not really stolen, but other mafia would fight me and win… and they were winning my money! I mean, come on guys, this is money I needed to buy properties, weapons, boosts and other items I would need to do their nasty little jobs. And I couldn’t figure out how to spend my money fast enough so someone wouldn’t fight me and win it.

I kept thinking, surely they have a bank. But where is it. And I truly kept looking for it. Month after month I looked for it. I even read up on the game to see if I could figure it out. Finally I saw it…. right next to the amount of money I had accumulated was a four letter word…. (BANK) Geeze Louise! Am I really that dense? Apparently so……

------------------------------------------------------

And here’s one from my not too distant past.

I had been on the road all day, having driven 3 1/2 hours to Springfield, Mo, given a presentation, and then tackled the 3 1/2 hour drive home. I was pooped. And I needed gas in my car.

I finally stopped at a gas station about 8 miles from home. I put the nozzle in the gas tank and engaged the pump. This was my chance to close my eyes for a few minutes. So that is what I did. I got back in the car, and laid my head back with my eyes closed. It felt so good. I’ll bet you are thinking, here it comes…. she fell asleep. Nope, that isn’t it.

I gave the gas pump enough time to do its thing, put the nozzle back on it’s hook, replaced the gas cap, and went inside to pay. The following conversation took place:

Me: I’m on pump 2.

Clerk: Pump 2 doesn’t show any gas has been pumped.

Me: I just pumped gas from pump 2 and it shows that I owe $16 (remember, this was a few years ago)

Clerk: Ok… give me a minute.

So she fiddles with her equipment for a bit and finally comes up with me owing $16. I pay her and tiredly begin the last leg of my trip home. I happened to look at my gas gauge about half way home and… it is on EMPTY!

That is when it hit me. In my foggy state of mind, I really hadn’t engaged the gas pump. The amount I saw due was from the previous guy. The clerk had backed the display to the previous customer to get to the amount I swore I owed. And I was running on fumes! And, of course, I was too embarrassed to go back. So I did the only reasonable thing there was to do.

I drove the rest of the way home and threw myself on the mercy of hubby. He picked up the phone, called the gas station and explained the situation. They thought it was hilarious! But they needed to wait until the day’s receipts were recorded that night to verify the mistake. And hubby took my car to fill it up the next day. And yes, he also had to put a little gas in it from our emergency gas can to get back to the gas station. Me? I avoided that gas station for a very long time.

And that my friends, is your ditzy stories for this week. Have a wonderful rest of the week and stay warm and safe!

Can you see me now?

Little Anna Rose was having trouble seeing the blackboard in school. I guess if you don’t know something could be improved, then you accept what is as “normal”. So, she never complained about not being able to see good. Fortunately, her teacher noticed, and suggested Tessa have her eyes checked.

I’m not sure what the vision problem is, because it isn't a simple matter of near sided/far sided, but the bottom line is that it is time for glasses.

Anna is a very matter of fact type child. Being tiny for her age, when she started school she told her mom, “I may be the smallest, but I’m also going to be the smartest!” She has taken the same approach in her thinking about getting glasses.

When her sister, Cara, said something to her about wanting glasses, Anna replied, “I didn’t choose to get glasses, I was told I need them”. End of story as far as she is concerned.

Personally, I think she looks precious! You rock Anna Rose!

Happy Valentine Day

We are spending our day at home with a fire in the wood stove, watching the snow flakes swirl around outside.

The only thing that could make this a better Valentine’s Day would be to have our kids and grandkids here.  That will have to wait for better weather and warmer days, though.

Here’s to you – hoping that you are doing whatever you want on this Valentine day.

Will I Ever Learn Wednesday

It is that time of week again that I get to tell the world just how ditzy I can be.

WILL I EVER LEARN…

Amazingly, this has been a very calm week for me. I guess when one doesn’t do much, the ditzometer goes down.

I spent time looking for my boots this morning only to remember they were still in my gym bag in my car. Will this snow ever go away! We only have 4 inches or so. It is nothing compared to what many of you are dealing with.

I agreed to play pool with Jim again. I lost again. We still suck!

---------------------------------------------------

Here is one of my not so proud moments from my not too distant past. The memory was nudged out of the cobwebs of my mind when I read Intenseguy's “Whiter Than White” post, which was inspired by my “Will I Ever Learn” post from last week. (if you aren’t confused yet, keep reading – you will be.)

I worked in a mainframe data center with many computer guru’s, and looked admirably on them from the distance of my administrative office - and took every opportunity I could to learn from them. What a trove of knowledge! We provided computer services for all the departments of state government. One of my responsibilities was administering the billing system. Without the techies' knowledge of what applications used what software and equipment, and their programming expertise, among a vast number of other considerations, my job would have been impossible. So, I spent many hours learning what was and was not possible. Then the impossible happened. Our well oiled team was disrupted with the appearance of a new boss.

New boss came to us with a data background, so expectations were that she would hit the ground running. Unfortunately, she wasn’t smart enough to rely on the expertise already in place, and began making changes without asking questions and learning why we were doing things the way we were. It was a disaster! And I (along with almost everyone else) was an UNHAPPY camper.

Here is where ditzyness raised its ugly head. She-boss sent out an email detailing changes that spelled disaster for our billing system. I chose to forward that email to a co-worker, pointing out just how dumb she was being. At least that is what I meant to do. What I really did was hit reply (to she-boss) with my scathing message. And I hit send. And I immediately gasped! NO!

I paced. I fretted. I was able to see on my computer whether the message had been read yet – and it hadn’t. That is when I started scheming…

She’s has a meeting soon….

Her office is guarded by a secretary. Is it almost time for a smoke break? …

We are required to never leave our password protected computers unattended without logging off – is she arrogant enough to decide the rules don’t apply to her…

I paced in and out of my office. Co-workers had to be wondering what I was up to, but nobody said a word.

That is when it happened. “She” went to a meeting. Her secretary immediately saw the smoke break opportunity. The path to her office was empty. Totally empty.

My heart was beating like a hammer in my chest. I knew if I got caught, I’d be fired on the spot. I made a dash for it! Even though I’d been in her office hundreds of times, I remember thinking that she sure did have a large office! Oh yea, the reason I’m in here…

Yes, she was arrogant enough to not password protect her computer or her email. I quickly logged on, found the deadly email I had sent, and with a click of the mouse, deleted the evidence.

And nobody ever knew. Nobody. For years. Over the years, I’ve only told three people. Until now. And now the whole world knows the truth – or at least the small world that reads my blog. Shhhhh. It’s our little secret.

So little snow and yet… Grounded!

We got sleet, snow and that dreaded “wintery mix” yesterday.  Snow doesn’t usually stop me from driving.  But sleet is an entirely different animal.

My original plan was to wait for it to stop snowing  and then go to work.  When the mix of sleet, snow and rain started in, the light bulb finally came on and I realized the weather was going to win and I needed to suck it up and just get going while I still could.

Did I mention that we live in the country?  Well, we live in the country on a gravel road.  Our road is one of the last to be bladed.  Our driveway usually gets bladed (thank you Jim) before our road.  But Jim was at work, and neither the drive or gravel road had been bladed.  So I knew it would be slick.

Halfway down the drive I realized I forgot my cell phone.  I tapped my brakes.  I kept going.  Tap, tap, tap.  I finally stop.  Now I am creeping to the end of the drive to turn around on the flat part of the road and back up far enough to get a run at the drive, so I can go back home for my cell phone.  I made it this far back up the drive.

Past experience has taught me that more times than not this drive wins.  And one of the things I love about my job as Church Secretary is that I work on my time schedule, with the one real deadline being that the bulletin needs to be in place by no later than 5:00 pm on Saturday.  So I made the executive decision to stay home.

Looking to the heavens, I head out on foot.

  

It is a short walk, but I still can’t resist my “I’m disgusted” look.  I used to be a master of this look, but with my kids grown and gone, I’m a bit out of practice.  Watch out Jim, I need to perfect “the look” again and I need someone to practice on!

The part of this that really sucked is if I could have just gotten to the black top, it was clear! 

I hope all of my friends all over the country are safe and warm.  This storm system has not been a nice one at all.

Stupid Question - Easy Answer

As I was driving into town to go to the Dentist the other day, I got to thinking...
I know - that is very dangerous

I got to thinking I wonder why all of the different types of Doctor names end in ist
Think about it: Podiatrist, Oncologist, Dentist, Gynecologist, Urologist
You get the picture. The list is endless!

Then I got to thinking even more (which is even more dangerous). I got to thinking about all of the other words that end in ist. Words like chemist, machinist, receptionist, and on and on.

That is when the light bulb came on (it does that occasionally) and my High School (or was it Grade School) English came back to me. IST is a suffix added to the end of a noun that indicates that individual believes in or practices the noun (or something like that).

And there you have it. My answer to my own stupid question!

It is cold and spitting snow here. Stay warm and safe wherever you are.

Will I Ever Learn Wednesday

It is that time of week again where I get to tell the world just how ditzy I can be.

WILL I EVER LEARN…

1. My sole purpose for going to town was to deliver an order of embroidered hats. Does it come as a surprise to anyone that the hats remained at home and I had to return to get them?
2. I finished my work out yesterday and noticed hubby had called. So I called him back. Getting voice mail, I left him a sweet little message. You know the kind, “I noticed you called – what do you want?” He called me back and said, much sweeter than I had, “I didn’t call you, hun. Are you sure it wasn’t from the other day”. To which I replied, “No, the time stamp definitely says “February 2, 10:39 am.” That is when I had to pause and regroup. Utoh. I finally remembered that I couldn’t find my phone when I left home around 10:30. So I did what any enterprising person would do, I called myself. And that my friends, was the missed call… me calling me.

   ------------------------------------------------

And here is one of my not so proud moments from the not too distant past.

We were spending the weekend with our friends, at the Lake of the Ozarks. I’ll have to admit, when we are with Patti and Gerard, it is difficult to call it a night. We tend to stay up long past the witching hour. On this particular night, the guys gave up the ghost long before us ladies did. Patti and I sat on the deck and solved the world’s problems. As the night wore on, the chill of the wind off the lake got downright cold. That wasn’t a problem – all I needed was to wrap myself up in the quilt from the couch.

At some point I experienced a common phenomena of the cold… I really, really had to go pee. So, bundled up like a mummy, I headed inside. After doing my thing, I bundled myself back up, arms securely held inside the quilt, and headed back out. That would not have been a problem except that I forgot there was a step down to the deck. And in the darkness I couldn’t see it. With my hands bound tightly within the safety of my warm quilt, I couldn’t catch myself. I went flying, and fell face down with nothing but my boobs, belly, and nose to cushion me from the fall. Can you say ouch? It was awful!

So the moral of this story is: 1) don’t let the guys go to bed first; 2) don’t bundle and pee; 3) don’t drink and bundle and pee; 4) don’t attempt to solve the world’s problems… it ain’t gonna happen!

Love ya ET aka Patti – cuz I know you will read this eventually!

Did you have a “will I ever learn moment: this week?

In case you were wondering…

PUNXSUTAWNEY, Pa. - The world's most famous groundhog, Punxsutawney Phil, emerged before chilly revelers in western Pennsylvania Tuesday to see his shadow, meaning winter will last another six weeks.

MSNBC News

According to the below article, Phil has been correct only 39% of the time.  I am going to hold onto that statistic for dear life, and plan on Spring being right around the corner.  I think I’ll head outside now and check to see if any of my Crocuses are peeking through the soggy ground.

Groundhog Day is held on Feb. 2, in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania every year, and you might be wondering how a groundhog landed the job of predicting the weather. If you're unfamiliar with the tradition, it goes like this: If the groundhog, Punxsutawney Phil, sees his shadow, we're stuck with six more weeks of winter. If he doesn't see his shadow, we luck out with an early spring.

The tradition dates back to 1887, and though the origins are unclear, it is said to have originated from ancient European weather lore in which a badger or sacred bear predicts the weather, rather than a groundhog. It also has religious origins, as it shares similarities with Candlemas Dayy, which is also on Feb. 2. According to an old English song, "If Candlemas be fair and bright,/ Come, Winter, have another flight."

Here are five facts you probably didn't know about Groundhog Day:

1. Punxsutawney Phil has seen his shadow 97 times, has not seen it 15 times, and nine years are unaccounted for.

2. The National Climatic Data Center reportedly stated that Phil's prediction's have been correct 39 percent of the time. This number is in conflict with Phil's club, which states he's been right 100 percent of the time.

3. According to the funny website, groundhog.org there's a legend that during Prohibition, Phil threatened to impose 60 weeks of winter on the community if he wasn't allowed a drink.

4. In the years following the release of Groundhog Day, a 1993 film starring Bill Murray, crowds numbering as high as 30,000 have visited Gobbler's Knob, a tiny hill in Punxsutawney where the ceremony takes place.

5. Though groundhogs typically live only six to eight years, Groundhog Day lore suggests that Phil drinks a magic elixir every summer, which gives him seven more years of life.

Information for this post came from here