Monday, July 13, 2009

Ditchawhatia?

As we headed out to church yesterday morning with Dakota and Austin in tow, we got halfway up our gravel road when I remembered we had forgotten to grab the bag of cucumbers from the kitchen counter.  We had more cucumbers from our garden than we could possibly eat, and I’m not going to can pickles this year.  The plan was to put them out in the back of church for people to take.

So Jim decides to do one of his famous three point turnarounds in the middle of the road.  And I am scared of ditches!  Petrified!  I always have been.  Jim tells me to close my eyes and explains to the boys that grandma has ditchaphobia (that’s what we call it).  In addition to my fear of snakes and heights, I have an irrational fear of ditches.  Pulling to the side of the road or heaven forbid backing up towards a ditch sends me into a shaking, whimpering, sniveling mess.

I survive the return to the house, retrieve the cucumbers and we head out again.  The boys are still talking about silly grandma from their back seat viewpoint.  Dakota speculates about a deep ravine (ok it was only a small ditch) on one side of the road and asked, “Grandma, what would that do to your ditchafearia?” 

I now have a new official name for this irrational fear – ditchafearia.

12 comments:

Funny in My Mind said...

That is hilarious!!!! We went 4 wheeling in a field last night after pizza and we kept driving over ditches, fast. You would have died!! I wasn't thrilled myself plus I was slightly full from dinner.
I also fear snakes and heights.

Anonymous said...

That is so funny. I saw your post title and was like 'huh?'!

Karla said...

wow..I hate ditches too..and heights and snakes....Maybe we knew eachother in a past life LOL

*goes to your house and raids the cucumber patch, brings home 2 or 3 bushels and makes cinnamon pickles...YUMMY"

The Wife O Riley said...

Can you please name my irrational fear of sand?

Nana said...

I have bitchafearia.

Intense Guy said...

As a fellow "been in the ditch" mate - I can understand your fear of the "bottomless ravine"...the one where the dropped pebble falls and clinks on the sides and falls and falls and falls and falls....

Or like the one the Wiley Coyote falls into with the whistling sound until the soft pa-thump and cloud of dust -

How is it he always climbs out?

P.s., someday I'm going to find a snake and take its picture - just to blog. :)

Whoa... fear of sand?

Anonymous said...

I also have a fear of snakes and heights. Those must be pretty common.

Queenie Jeannie said...

Well hun, they don't call 'em IRRATIONAL fears for nothin', right???

And for the record, being afraid of snakes is SMART!!!! Blech!

Deanna said...

OMG Funny - I would have totally freaked! We have 4-wheelers and I avoid all the places Jim goes.
LOL Yaya - got your attention huh
Karla sings - "I don't like spiders and snakes... and ditches and heights....Dang I so would give you some cucumbers! Would you share the cinnamon pickles recipe with me?
Oh dear Wifey - fear of sand? I'll have to think on that one
OMG Nana me too! LOL
Ah Iggy, I knew if anyone would understand, you would. Are you saying we were traumatized by our childhood cartoons? *makes note to send Iggy my snake picture so he can blog it*
Yea Landy, those are common but not less fearful. I'll never understand why parasailing didn't bother me, though...
Ha Jeannie - point well taken!

LadyStyx said...

I hate heights too, well depending on the situation. Looking over a bridge? No prob. Looking down from a ladder? No way!

AliceKay said...

Ditchafearia...that's pretty cute, Dakota. :) I'm not overly fond of ditches myself. There are a lot of big ones along these back country roads, and doing a turnaround on them isn't very fun.

(i have pics of snakes...anyone wanna see?)

Toriz said...

LOL! It's amazing what some people are afraid of.